Shotgun Love

Granted this isn’t your normal booty post but when I saw this, I felt the ass loving world had to see this, like a public service announcement. As a lover of all things booty, I always held a certain amount of amusement and dismay at all the boobie lovers out there. I felt this way because what you saw wasn’t always what you got. Sure that chick “could” have some double D BATS but it could more than likely just be Victoria and her futuristic R&D department working their wonders and confusing men every where. I laugh as women strutted their fronted… uh, fronts, to the public all along perpetrating a fraud. Leaving me feeling great that as an ass man I never had to worry about my glorious Galvitrons and Unicrons ever joining in on such behavior. Enter the Booty Pop Panties.

NOooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo!!!!!!!

WHY?! Why must we take something so sacred, so beautiful and desecrate it by adding levels of fraud to it. Now chicks with a Bumblebee butt can now get upgraded to a Hot Rod or Megatron ass?? This is unforgivable. Honestly, why do women lie to us in such sexy, sexy ways? Maybe, men should start wearing the “Cock Rocket” and make women see 10 inches when its only like 5. (Ed note: writer is not included in this 5 inch category) Sigh. This all started with the girdle, damn you Paul Poiret, I blame this all on you!!!

“You on top of her when you big as hell, she being nice not telling you smell…”

WOOOOOOOOO… chill B. Pumper you killing them out there. We all know you have never made a gay tape and I know I’m a little late with this video but seriously, Ricky Ross, I don’t know what you did to get this man upset but please rethink your strategy. If you didn’t know, BP will “smack a nigga with grill cheese” if he has to. He has also never made a gay tape. That’s a whole separate industry. He’s a producer now with Evil Angel and he owns his own masters. Plus he has never made a gay tape. I feel bad for Ricky Ross for fucking with G-Unit now they have let loose Lloyd Banks twin brother loose from the gates. Brian Pumper might be the G.O.A.T of rapping Porn Stars. He’s my personal favorite rapping Porn Star. Check the video after the jump to see him decimate a couple fellow Porn Stars in a lyrical freestyle battle of Epic Proportions. Honestly, he’s probably the only person that freestyles, I think the other two guys wrote their shit.

twitter | Evil Angel

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This is an open letter to one of my favorite pornstars, Debi Diamond.

I remember growing up fantasizing about you.  You didn’t have big breasts, but that your head game was crazy.  You jumped on dicks like they owned you money or stole something from you (in a good way).  Now keep what I’m saying in mind, Ms. Diamond.   I’m a breast man and I could care less for head, in movies and in real life.  But you captured my attention like no other.  It’s like tuning into tennis to watch Roger Federer in the finals.  There is no way in hell I would watch a regular tennis match…it has to be something to draw me in.  Can’t you see you were my Roger Federer.

I heard a few months ago that you made a comeback and got a boob job.  Excited wasn’t the word that came to mind when I heard that news.  I ran to my local computer and checked out a scene that would live with me forever (here).  You can still fuck like a champion.  But what happen to your breasts?  Why the boob job?  And how fucking bad is this boob job.  Your tits are hanging off your underarms.  I can go in for about 200 words, but I won’t.  I will pop in my classic Debi Diamond movies and reminiscence.

Yours Truly,

NutMeg